Alex Perry Counselling
Counselling Diploma.
BACP Registered.
Cruse Accredited.
07816 384491
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June 29th, 2017

6/29/2017

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There are no medals at the end of our lives for being right more times than anyone else. The purpose of personal growth is about what we do when we get things wrong and how we want to change things for next time or make ammends. The power is accepting our part to play but not needing to take responsibility for others responses. It is human to be fallable and mess up at times and we do not need to beat our selves up for when this happens. 
We are all doing the best we can with the knowledge and experience we have at the time , which will always be always changing, so we need to adapt our ideas and beliefs accordingly. If we knew how to do things better at the time.....we would have, so shame is not needed or helpful if we want to learn and develop healthily.
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Anxiety on the increase............................. 

4/8/2017

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We live in a very complex, high pressured and judgemental society where we are expected to be on the ball 24/7. There is  criticism at every turn and blame when we are not 'perfect' all the time.
we are all human and humans are supposed to make mistakes, behave badly and get it wrong sometimes as this is the way we develop and learn as individuals.
I can help you to develop coping strategies, build self esteem and reduce anxiety levels so you can be free to blossom and fullfil your potential.
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Bullying and the Limbic System

1/28/2013

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For anyone that has suffered bullying it can be very useful to know that when we are being bullied, we very often go into our 'limbic state'. 

In primitive times the leader of the 'clan', so to speak, had earned the position to be there by being the fastest/smartest/most cunning/strongest. So when this ‘leader’ said to do this and that, each member of the clan would do it without thinking independently. This was because they were in the ‘submissive role’ (this would be the limbic state of brain function). This was essential because if everyone started doing their own thing, for instance when out hunting in a group, then it would be chaos and nothing would be achieved.  

In times of crisis, for example, if being rescued by a paramedic or fire fighter, we don't tend to argue or think for ourselves, we gratefully put ourselves in their trust at this vulnerable time. Doing this can save our lives.

Bullies have not particularly earned this respect, they assume their authority and use this to control. Once this position of authority over another is established the other person becomes the ‘subordinate’ and goes into his or her ‘limbic system’, unable to think or reason properly at the time. This is when the limbic system doesn’t serve us well. But it doesn’t mean that we are weak because our bodies are doing a natural function. However it leads the bullied person or ‘subordinate’ feeling frustrated and powerless.

Realizing this can help us not to be hard on ourselves when it happens. Only once we are aware of the process and who triggers us, can we start the process of changing things.

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